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Bondage Tip #2 – Communication and Safewords

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Communication is very important in any bondage session. Proper communication can enhance the trust in a BDSM session and will allow the boy to enjoy the session more. How it is done should be worked out before a session begins. Any form of communication chosen should be clear and easily interpreted. Verbal communication should never be in the form of “Yeah” or “Sure”. “Yes SIR” and “No SIR” are much clearer and a more acceptable form of communication. For times when a boy is muzzled or gagged, they can of course no longer speak clearly. My preference is the “three loud grunts” method to communicate. When something is going wrong, they give me three loud grunts. Once I have heard them, I will then figure out what the problem is and correct it. Having them nod their head is a poor method as it is unclear. They may not be able to move their head in their bonds as well.

Safewords

Safewords are also a good idea, though I tend not to use them. A safeword is used as a STOP to a session. I feel that if a safeword is used, I’ve pushed the boy too far and too fast. In that case, I have done something wrong. A safeword should never be ignored regardless, as trust will break down quickly if they are. Make sure the boy picks his own word. He is likely to forget it if you picked it for him. There are other ways to communicate, but remember that whatever is chosen must be agreed upon before things start.

Bondage Tip #1 – Locks

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Locking gear is a favorite of mine and is quite apparent with a quick view of this blog. When you have a lot of locking gear, having things keyed alike is a good idea. It makes it easier to unlock any item in the event of an emergency. It also reduces the problems you might encounter when locking the gear in the first place. It may cost a little more to do, but you'll reap the benefits with easier play. I've found the cost varies from $3.99 to over $6.00 per lock. It all depends on what you're looking for. It is also best to keep at least two or three separate key rings stashed away in case you lose one set. Nothing is as big a turnoff as having to use bolt cutters or a hacksaw to get a boy out of his bonds. Well, unless he is in riveted shackles.

Highlights from Dore (Up Your Alley) 2011

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My first real big event was Dore in 2011. I thoroughly enjoyed myself that time. I had three chained together at first, releasing one later so he could go take photos. This time I also had LALthrBondage with me, who was very helpful in guiding me through the crowds.

Instructing the boy
Instructing the boy
Gagging my boy after answering a question.
Gagging my boy after answering a question.
So many straps!
So many straps!
Zipping the pups (Minddrive) muzzle shut.
Zipping the pups (Minddrive) muzzle shut.
My group at Dore in 2011
My group at Dore in 2011
Full crew at Dore 2011
Full crew at Dore 2011